上週一直想寫篇有關Vonnegut的blog，因為一些俗事耽擱了，直到週日晚上才有點空，抱著消化不良的肚子，蹲在馬桶上寫這篇blog。Vonnegut在1984年曾經嘗試過自殺，過了超過二十年，最後也算是高壽去世了。
馮內果（Kurt Vonnegut）上週四在紐約去世，享年八十四歲。在國際間孚有眾望的Vonnegut，以他獨特的小說筆法創造出許多反諷人性的佳作。剛剛在Wikipedia上查了一下Vonnegut的簡歷，這人唸過Cornell跟Carnegie Institute of Technology（就是現在的Carnegie Mellon University），後來以德裔美國人的身份參與二戰，還被德軍俘虜，二戰結束後得到一個他稱為"ludicrously negligible wound"的紫心獎章。
高中時讀過他的《自動鋼琴》，從此對Artificial Intelligence這樣的概念開始感到興趣；如果鋼琴師的演奏都可以被自動鋼琴精準的複製、模仿，那人到底還擁有什麼。這有點Philosophy of Mind的味道；可是直到很多年以後，我才知道這本書的意念居然比我高中所以為的還要深邃。當年那個念了很多小說的高中生，其實對於哲學的所知是很膚淺的。
"You are surrounded by loving machines, hating machines, greedy machines, unselfish machines, brave machines, cowardly machines, truthful machines, lying machines, funny machines, solemn machines. Their only purpose is to stir you up in every conceivable way, so the Creator of the Universe can watch your reactions. They can no more feel or reason than grandfather clocks."
"Your parents were fighting machines and self-pitying machines. Your mother was programmed to bawl out your father for being a defective money-making machine, and your father was programmed to bawl her out for being a defective housekeeping machine. They were programmed to bawl each other out for being defective loving machines. "
"Then your father was programmed to stomp out of the house and slam the door. This automatically turned your mother into a weeping machine. And your father would go down to a tavern where he would get drunk with some other drinking machines. Then all the drinking machines would go to a whorehouse and rent fucking machines. And then your father would drag himself home to become an apologizing machine. And your mother would become a very slow forgiving machine."
最近跟女友反反覆覆的吵架，分手，然後陷入復合/不復合的無窮迴圈，在超過負荷的堆疊裡跌跌撞撞的走不出來。其實去除一些人與人之間細節的差異，爭執的論點似乎永遠類似。
這實在太弔詭了，親愛的妳說是不是。我們今天不復合，好嗎。